When life hands you a lemon you eat it.I started this diet thing. This insane, ridiculous, DIET. I seriously don't want anyone to tell me it is stupid or unhealthy. Not unless you can tell me that you don't eat anything unhealthy yourself and you wouldn't want to look REALLY good for your husband's upcoming 20 year high school reunion. Of course even if you said it, I would not believe you. You may as well just not I guess. Not while I am in this state. In this state I am liable to stab you with a fork.
I started this INSANE diet 4 days ago. I am on my 5th day. If you ever fast for 24 hours and you have small children, and most especially if you have a baby, then you know what THAT feels like. Excruciating. Careful, if you say that you feel FABULOUS because you are being "filled" with the spirit I may have to stab you with that fork again.
I have lost seven pounds. Seven. In 4 days. 4 excruciating days. This morning I got back from my walk and decided to put a slice of lemon in my water. Water because that is all I can have till lunch. I wasn't supposed to eat the lemon. Just squeeze the juice into the water. I devoured that lemon. Devoured it. Ate it like it was the last piece of food on the planet. Char just called it desperation. I call it INSANITY. I am trying very hard to not stab myself with the fork at this point.
I was feeding the baby a piece of toast and eggs this morning. He didn't really want toast and eggs. I could feel the heat rising....how dare he not eat this DELICIOUS toast??? What more could you ask for than a piece of warm bread slathered in warm melted butter??? What I ask???? You know your bad off when you get mad at the BABY.
Every single thing I have made and fed that baby over the last 4 days sounds Divine. I am so not exaggerating. I can list it all off right now: peanut butter and apple jelly on soft wheat bread, Bisquick pancakes drowning in maple syrup, hot sizzling Costco meatballs right out of the oven, a full plate of Sandy's pumpkin chocolate chip cookies...for crying out loud. GIVE ME THAT FORK.
Will I keep going? Today I will. If I get on that scale tomorrow morning 2 pounds lighter than I was this morning then I will do it one more day. So on and so forth. Two pounds a day is worth it. Anything less and I will be using that fork for Magleby cake purposes.
11 comments:
HOW could you get mad at the BABY?!?!?!?
I hate feeling hungry! I hope it works for you!
I did a metabolism boosting diet for four weeks, I've been off it for almost two months and I'm still losing weight.
Dude. First of all, you haven't lost that much WEIGHT. Water does NOT count as weight. And you don't want to lose muscle. It's INCHES you want to lose. And working the muscles and tightening them will help with that. Fat, too, of course, but you have to burn that sucker off. Two pounds a day is NUTS and don't tell ME not to tell YOU not to be a silly goose. You know double dang well that it slows down, and hits snags, and I will NOT have you dragging around here looking pitiful because you are only three ounces smaller today than you were yesterday. I have forks of my OWN, and you know it!
K - Which is why I LOVE you dearly. Because you WILL say it - even when threatened by a starving neighbor wielding a fork. I am done by the way. I don't think I'll write a post about that. I will finish today because I believe in finishing what I start because if ya don't it messes with yer psyche! By the weigh - har - I have been drinking so much water it isn't even funny....and I am doing this shot thing and that is suppose to make it so your body burns stored fat (which I have) and supposed to make you not hungry (which I am). However I am SO DONE. I am so glad you tell me I am a silly goose. Because I am. And that is me. And you love me ANYWAY.
I did a cleanse/diet once. About 10years ago. Couldn't even have salt to flavor my bland diet of salad (without dressing), potatoes (without butter, salt or sour cream--just the potato!), and juiced vegetables interspersed with pysillium-husk drinks. Tempting, I know... Lost a ton of weight. But, I was starving! As soon as that diet was over, I gained the weight back--and then some. I ate everything that I could get my hands on! The box looked good! I was STARVING, I say!
Why do we do these things to ourselves???
We are all silly!
Darned reunions...
I want to hear more about Chastina's metabolism boosting diet!
Misty! You crazy fork wielding starved lunatic! What in sam hill are you killing yourself for a stupid 20 year reunion that isn't even yours???? Are you kidding me? Everyone is going to be so wrapped up in trying to see themselves in your husband's shiny head and then what will you do? Huh? Walk over to the buffet and stuff your face angrily mumbling asking yourself why you even attempted to go on some stupid diet? AND DO NOT even give me the crappy line about......(saying this in a snively whiney voice).....you have it sooooooo easy. You don't know what it is like to have to worry about what you eat.......DO NOT GET ME STARTED or you won't be the only one running around waving a fork!
Seriously. I think you are very beautiful and I know you'd like to look smashing for your hubby's 20th. Just remember one thing huh? Just remember that your hubby loves you, thinks you are gorgeous, and ravishing and that is all that matters. Okay? When all is said and done....the reunion is over....you aren't going home with any of "them" so who cares what they think (or you may think they are thinking). As long as your hubby thinks you're 'IT'......that is all that matters. What you need is a new outfit and some trashy shoes! That'll cheer you up! :D
Ok, so, I just got done crying. My mom emailed me too. I get it. Rachel, that was the SWEEEETEST comment I ever got. My mom's email looked a lot like K's. Now I am just relieved cause I am going to eat something now. :) Thank You.
Hi. This is Kathy V. I'm just using Chris's email account so I can post.
Ok. I've got news for those who don't know this. You actually lose weight better when you eat more. The trick is you have to eat healthy food, but you won't starve to death. Now I know I'm not the picture of weight loss. That's because it is such a pain for me to eat all the time while I'm at work. But once (before I turned 40 and the rules all changed) I lost 30 pounds in a couple of months by eating voraciously, but eating only healthy foods. I was seeing a doctor and he put me on this yeast control diet and when he saw me at a check up he asked me if I was getting enough to eat because I had lost so much weight. I just laughed. I was eating more than I usually ate, just trying to satisfy my craving for sugar. I just didn't touch the sugar.
But even so, I'd like to hear more about Chastina's diet.
I agree Kathy, our bodies do need fuel...the good stuff. I have lost weight after child #4 and #5. Body for Life and Weight Watchers. Basically my body wants lots of small "meals" that consist of actual food and not cheetos. Anyway, I did this HCG thing because people were saying that you aren't hungry on it...because of the shot...and I thought...NOT HUNGRY???? Cool! Well, I was. Maybe I am just a freak. ;) Such is life. Lifted weights with Paul this morning...life is good.....you are all FABULOUS.
Ah, HCG, good to hear from someone the "real" truth about the hunger. I just keep thinking to myself, since when does the Misty I know need to go on a diet? I am sure you already looked great, but I can definitely see how the HCG thing is tempting. I would have done it myself already if I didn't have Ken here telling me what he thinks, lol! So, having done it, would you recommend it to someone?
But here's the deal Clarice..the women I talked to didn't feel hungry. So what is up with that? Maybe I am too active to do that diet. I WAS SO HUNGRY. One woman said that while she was on the diet she was doing fine, not hungry, until one day she went out to do yard work and after that she was so hungry. She didn't do yard work anymore. I walk every morning, bike almost every afternoon....take care of six kids...maybe my lifesyle just doesn't suit this kind of thing? I can't say that I wouldn't recommend it because maybe I am just the weirdo. It does work for other women....:)
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